All I do is smile

I Drive the pain deep inside
Try to pass out the night and wait for the day
I try to keep the failures aside
But they keep coming in my way

I try to keep my friends close
But they have decided to part ways
When fallen in pits I tried but never rose
seems in my paths an eternal failure lays

I keep quite enduring all pain
waiting for success to cross paths
but I watch in utter disdain
as my success is locked behind the bars

I try to remain calm and composed
when my loved ones leave
for them I am being disposed
and this for them is a relief

And when i cry
i quickly calm myself
and wash up my eyes
Still agony sneaks near via stealth

I loose all hope
I loose all those who were near
I see no scope
Still its a smile that I wear...

A joy experienced never before

This noon when I revisited
the little earthen pot
that I've daily refilled
for so many years;
I saw a pigeon
quenching its thirst
with the elixir,
pecking its beak
at the fragile surface,
and the pearls
that dropped back from its beak.

Soon it was joined
by many of its mates
and they all drank merrily
and flew away.

I don't know why
but this gave me
a joy experienced never before
The joy of helping
a creation of the almighty.

A dying seed

The day I met you
nothing remained the same.
I couldn't stop thinking
of meeting you again.

When we became friends
I shared every secret with you
& wished you would keep 'em safe.
Thankfully my wish came true.

Now I think there is more to us than just friends
well atleast from my side.
For if this was untrue,
How would you come in my dreams every night?

But even true love is worthless
if it isn't returned as well.
Will you have the same feelings,
Who can possibly tell?

I have no courage
to tell you how I feel.
A denial, You don't know,
What would mean.

I am virtually screaming
"Would anyone tell her how much I want her"
But I simply cannot take
'No' for an answer.

I must hold myself back.
If not, it'll make you feel stabbed from behind.
I must face the reality,
that you can never be mine.

You are much too beautiful
for someone like me.
For I am just a plant
while you deserve a tree.

These feelings must be killed
for they have no tomorrow.
Any delay in doing so
will only lead to sorrow.

I must control my heart
and empower my mind.
This ain't anything new.
This happens all the time.

Sometimes a beautiful seed dies
that could've grown into a plant
in absence of
the water that it wants.